WHAT IT’S LIKE TO BE A SHE MALE - It Ain’t Easy Bein’ a Tranny

Once again Dollar Bill imparts his questionable wisdom nauseating us all with his smug self-righteousness! Does he really know anything about the she male subculture or is he just jerking himself off? You be the judge!

Often, outsiders to the subculture - and even guys who call she male ads in the papers and websites - have no idea what really goes in the mind of a she male, or why she decided to be the transgendered person she is in the first place. And while I am not myself a transsexual, I’ve certainly spent enough time observing the transgendered sociological phenomenon via my long relationships with many of the girls on the scene to understand exactly what makes a she male tick. And if I don’t, you can trust that somebody will call up after reading this to let me know exactly how full of shit I am.

Regardless, here’s my take on the situation: The essence of this culture stems from the theory that occasionally, female psyches are born in male bodies or vice versa, causing a gender identity crisis which renders the person in a constantly conflicted emotional state. Obviously, if you have a man’s body but female’s impulses, you got a problem! Up until fifty or sixty years ago, there wasn’t much anybody could do. Yes, you could dress up in women’s clothing and attempt to look feminine. But you couldn’t have tits, ass or a vagina. And so...homosexuality, while the only viable alternative, wasn’t really the answer. Yes, you could make love with the gender you preferred but still, it wasn’t quite the same as actually transforming your body to another gender, the only true manner in which one could successfully attract a heterosexual of the preferred gender.

Now this is a little complicated for heteros to comprehend. There is a difference between a gay or transgendered person making love to a straight man - versus a homosexual man. Gay men may appreciate a phat booty and a big set of juggs. But they don’t crave them. Straight men do. And for many, if there’s a big, stiff dick attached...all the better! So as a homosexual man, a person with a gender identity crisis has no hope of attracting a straight man. But if he embarks on the transition and becomes a she male with womanly parts...bada BOOM! Now she has hot, straight guys wanting to suck her tits and fuck her ass!

While a significant majority of New York’s she males are still pre-op (they have their dicks), many are in a state of transition and planning to undergo sex reassignment surgery in the not-too-distant future. There are a few reasons why many pre-ops in transition are still pre-ops rather than having already had the surgery. First, the metamorphosis from male to female isn’t cheap. It takes money -- and a lot of it! Chicks with dicks make more money than post-op transsexuals. It’s just a fact! The customers want that little something extra or else they would simply see females. So the girls stay pre-op to earn enough money to eventually make the change!

Second, a candidate for the surgery can’t just walk up to any doctor and go have the procedure done. She must first undergo rigorous psychological counseling and analysis so that the physician feels comfortable making this radical change. And of course, the surgery is traumatic. And finally, post-ops don’t always enjoy sex as much as they used to especially if they were functional pre-ops. So some are hesitant to take the chance on severing some vital nerves which has on occasion made post-ops numb in a very strategic area.

If you think that some trannies are a few cards short of a fifty-two card deck -- and wildly dramatic and emotional -- there is a medical reason. Most she males undergo hormone therapy. Indeed, many shoot up every day to maintain their feminine personna! When you shoot estrogen in a born-male body what you get is a fight between the male androgen hormone and the female estrogen hormone raging in the person’s bloodstream. And that battle can manifest itself via wild mood swings and basic bipolar behavior. Girls have suggested on several occasions “Don’t come over. I just shot hormones and I’m a little crazy.” Enough said. I always heed that warning! I got enough drama in my life.

Female hormones, while making Miss Honey softer, rounder and more feminine also tend to make the dick soft and nonfunctional -- as does constant sexual activity! She males in the escort biz have the basic problem that the customers want them hard. But how many guys can you get hard for in a day -- especially if they’re gross and disgusting? Hence, viagra, cialis or levitra enters the she male’s drug regimen regardless of whether she’s having sex for fun or money. The point is that trannies do a lot of drugs. And I’m not saying they’re heroin addicts or coke heads. They simply inject foreign substances and/or take them orally to a) look good and b) perform well. But all this takes its toll on the mind and body. So if trannies weren’t nuts to begin with, they have all these substances to help them along on the road to insanity.

Often, the search for the perfect man is in constant motion - whether the hunter is a female or she male. But with she males there’s a lot of chicanery involved. Thus, dimly-lit club life comes to the fore. Remember, trannies want a straight guy, so low lights, loud music, liquor and/or other mind-altering substances are a she male’s best friend. Better to ease that straight man into the transsexual reality than slap him in the face (no pun intended) with it. It’s a big turn-on when she males are mistaken for females. It make the girls feel self-actualized to fool a guy into thinking he’s rubbing up on a girl - rather than a she male. Easing that guy from a booty dance at a club to the bed is a gauntlet that faces many horny pre-ops! It ain’t easy bein’ a tranny! What can I say?

Whether a she male is a big party girl or a homebody, most spend an inordinate amount of time and money improving their feminine figure and appearance. There are always trips to the manicurist and pedicurist. Artful fingers and toes always attract a hot guy! Then there’s the hair salon. Trannies spend big bucks doing their hair. Hundreds of dollar a throw to get that perfect streak of blonde and seductive cut is commonplace. A visit to the electrolysis lab to remove some unwanted hair is often on the she male’s beautification itinerary as well. And finally, a junket to the surgeon for pre-op prepping or post-op check-ups can be on the list. Trannies are often surgery addicts, constantly fine-tuning their faces or bodies to achieve perfection. The fact that many are “surged” to death seems to escape many drama queens. I remember one client returning from $15,000 worth of brow trimming, nose-jobbing etc... and I didn’t even see the difference! But when I saw her six hours after some lipo and a face peel...that was an entirely different story. I couldn’t look. The girl was as scary as Freddy Kruger with all that skin hanging off her face! Gaaag!!

Sometimes, she males want to assimilate into mainstream society. And sometimes they just want to hang in their subculture. So when it comes time to hang out, they may venture into a mixed venue filled with straight, gay and transgendered people...or go to hang with their own and the people who adore them (tranny chasers). Pursuant to this, there are several places (Escuelita or Edelweiss) where the girls go for a night out in their element. If they’re looking for boyfriends or hot sex with a cute stranger, they’ll hit places like the old Sound Factory where virtually people of all genders and sexual orientations congregate. Where she chooses to hang depends on the mood and/or the girl’s personality.

She male family life is yet another facet mainstream people rarely consider. Are trannies such social pariahs that their families simply can’t deal - leaving them as orphans? Apparently, the answer to that question is no -- especially with foreigners. Mothers, brothers and sisters seem to visit from the home country quite often. One of my Venezuelan clients has a she male sister! She and the two “girls’” mother are visiting right now as I write this. South American cultures seem to feel that transsexuality is less freakish than their American counterpart. Gorgeous she males abound in Brazil where the country all but oozes sexuality. I’ve actually met a few of the girls’ siblings or mothers and I didn’t find them or the situation strange at all.

But once in a female whorehouse, I ran into a phone girl who was actually the blood mother of one of the girls she was selling over the phone. A mother booking her daughter to have sex with strangers for money? That I found a little disturbing. Go figure! Until next month...enjoy yourself with these fascinating erotic ladies! Why not? You only live once. Just pleez....no Congressmen Foleys. That’s all I ask!